Our current social model has an intrinsic fault that causes it to shatter from within: namely, it actively tramps down men and fosters boys. As people grow up, they remain kids in adult bodies — with no sense of Purpose, vision, or responsibility.
One of the main differences between men and boys is that the latter are anxiously obsessed with their whims and wants, with what they are getting, and whether they are getting enough of it. It’s a shacky, immature tremolo of ME-ME-ME, NOW-NOW-NOW. ‘Am I loved enough?’, ‘Am I appreciated enough?’, ‘What others think of me?’ It’s all about self-gratification, self-indulgence and the desire to validate their ego, here and now.
The problem with cultivating the Me-addiction is that boys are easily manipulated and distracted. They would do what society tells them, not what is right or true. Because they haven’t yet developed a clear idea of who they are and what they stand for, they easily drift from one idea to another, one project to the another, never feeling fully satisfied.
The initial excitement from ‘getting’ (a new car, a new job, a new girlfriend) soon wears out and the emptiness inside cries for a new, bigger, shinier toy. That chase wears out and desensitises the mind until eventually, no new thing is exciting enough to save the person from depression and the feeling of drowning in a void of pointless existence.
That place of pain and desperation leads to the most tragic choices, which we see all around us.
The traits that set a man apart is the ability to focus, to look ahead and stay committed to his purpose. A man’s focus is not what he can get, first and foremost, but what he can contribute. He starts asking bigger questions like, ‘Who am I, really?’, ‘What is the unseen divine power behind this all?’, ‘What am I here for?’ he contemplates how he can be of greater service, and what legacy is he going to leave behind – for the world, for his community and his family.
A man recognises that he needs to train to be strong, mentally and physically, to be able to stand for what matters and support those who need his help. He chooses what he wants most over what he wants now. He’s focused on becoming a more advanced, wise and effective version of himself, every day.
A man is a person with a vision. He knows who he wants to become and how he wants to contribute to the lives of others. That clarity helps him to keep focused and disciplined on his path, and to achieve his goals. He doesn’t chase after little whims or passing social fashions but instead stays for the greater and unshakable truths. He is not swayed by what other people think of him because he knows where he is going, and what value he offers to the world.
Our spiritual maturity is not down to our age but our awareness. It’s a conscious choice that needs to be made and then committed to. Only then a true transformation is possible. Our society needs mature empowered masculinity, true men and leaders, now more than ever.
Don’t wait until society moulds your priorities for you. Look for your clarity and purpose. Find your path that will make you feel proud of who you are becoming.
He who stands for nothing will fall for anything.